I’ve always been a very anxious person. Worrying and stressing about every little thing — wondering if something is going to go wrong and how I would adapt to that. I saw this flowchart about worrying and what you can do about it. It was very informative, to say the very least.
Of course, reading the chart is simple, but implementing it into your everyday life is very difficult. I’ll admit, I’m still trying to abide by the rules and cut out worrying no matter if I can do anything about it or not. I mean, why do we worry anyway? If there’s nothing in this world we can do about it, there’s no point. We work ourselves up, overthink about anything and everything — analyzing, and nothing is solved but time is wasted. Precious time. But if there is something we can do about it, quit worrying about it and just do it. Nike style.
The point is, cut out the worries and just be.
“Don’t Worry, Be Happy” – Bobby McFerrin
“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a tough battle” – Socrates
Times are changing…fast. I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase: “People often confuse politeness with flirting”. Ain’t that the truth. Is it so hard to believe that people are just trying to be genuinely nice to others? I fully believe in treating people the way you want to be treated. Sure, I don’t get the same respect that I give most of the time, but that doesn’t stop me. I try to be all about kindness where ever I go. Restaurants, stores, anywhere. Because you know what? You don’t know anything about who you talk to – even if they are an acquaintance. You don’t know half the battles they’re going through. How hard they’re fighting just to stay afloat in life. Maybe they or someone close to them is dying of cancer. They lost their job. Their relationship didn’t work out the way they thought it would. They’re struggling financially. It could be anything in the world but we never think of these things.
Maybe all a person needs is to smile, to laugh, to be hugged, to be talked to, to be complimented. Tell me one person who doesn’t want at least one of these situations to happen. Do you ever see a stranger and think to yourself, “Boy, that jacket looks so good on her”, or, “That guy’s presentation was really good! I can learn a thing or two from him”. Thinking these thoughts is one thing. But what would happen if we actually told that person the good thoughts we actually thought about them? What’s the worst that could happen? I have a feeling about the best that could happen: You can change their world. All they needed was that bit of confidence or that one compliment to turn their day right-side up.
If we start this trend of saying nice things or giving compliments to others, I believe people will be more inclined to speak their mind. It’ll show just how much we need to hear it and I could only hope we would pass it on. Learn from how people treat you. Sure, there are people who are just jerks. Actually, there are quite a bit. But I do know that there are MANY kind people out there. I’m betting that the majority don’t open their mouths and say anything. They go about their business and their business only. But if we try and speak our mind to brighten someone’s day, I think more nice things will be spoken and there won’t be as much hostility in the world.
Have you ever sat at a stop light and just watched drivers as they pass you? I don’t think many of us even realize exactly who is in the other car. We just drive to our destination and it’s almost like there are just cars on the road and not people inside of them. We get so angry and frustrated when drivers don’t drive the right way. It’s really something though, at least it is for me – peeking inside the cars and watching other people. Figuring out their story. Where they’re driving to. The families they’ve got back at home. People watching in general is such an interesting thing to do. You can really learn a lot about others. Mannerisms, personality, even insecurities if you’re able to study them long enough (only if they don’t notice you watching them!)
When we first see a person, we judge them by their appearance. (Not the bad kind of judge, just getting a first impression appearance-wise). It’s the first aspect that attracts us. Once you’ve been observing a person, you start to notice their personality. Their quirks, their mannerisms, their insecurities, the way they view life. Of course, it’s not instantly that we learn these aspects about other people. It takes some time. It’s a first impression of the personality. There’s beauty in it though — learning about others. Knowing you’re not the only person who has certain flaws. No one is perfect and people watching is a great way to show that everyone’s the same in the fact that we all have some type of quirks. It’s a great reminder. We always hear about the good things happening in everyone else’s life: new job, new relationship, new house, engagement, marriage, being pregnant, just simply being very successful, etc. We unfortunately don’t hear and don’t realize the not so great things happening in people’s lives such as problems at home, unable to find a job, relationship issues, money issues, etc. The list goes on and on, but it’s certainly more than true that someone is dealing with some type of struggle at the moment, whether they choose to share it or not. If you’re able to watch people for quite a bit of time, you just might be able to find out their story. You can read people by the clothes they wear, the emotions they wear on their faces, their mannerisms, and how they interact with others. It’s really just important to realize that just because a person looks well put together from the outside, doesn’t mean they’re well put together from the inside. Many people are falling apart on the inside, trying their damnedest to look and feel like how they view everyone else around them – like they have no issues.
I think we judge and treat others poorly way more often than we should. Just because you were treated like dirt certainly does not mean you have the right to stoop down to their level and treated them poorly. And to even take it out on someone who doesn’t deserve to be treated poorly. We often find that happening to us – being taken out on. I’m not saying that’s the right thing to do and you have every right to get upset, but why continue that vicious circle and act the same as everybody else? There’s a solution that we all should live by to try and change the tide for the future – kill them with kindness. Who wants to live in a world filled with unhappy and rude people? It’s only going to get worse as time goes on – I’ve experienced that already in the past couple of years. I know we’d be starting off small at first, but if enough people started treating others with kindness no matter how they’re treated, I believe we can try and turn this unhappy world around.
Karma is life’s way of teaching you a lesson. Whether you have done good to somebody or have acted in an aggressive and spiteful way, you will get what’s coming to you. I fully believe in karma because I’ve seen it happen — to myself and others.
Just yesterday I was driving home from work and I was immediately cut off by a driver trying to cut through traffic. Of course, it infuriated me. The driver got incredibly close to my car so I had to slam on my breaks. It’s difficult to keep your peace in these type of situations, but honestly, it’s a great test. Stay calm and hope that karma takes over. Luckily for me, as soon as the driver moved over another lane, a different car cut him off. I’m not a terrible person to wish an accident among someone, but I am glad he was able to experience exactly what he’d done to me.
Hopefully people will learn how to interact in a peaceful and calm manner. I have noticed that more and more people are becoming aggressive. We need to remind them that life is way too short to be angry all the time. Why not enjoy the rest of the time you have by sharing your love, peace, and joy with others?
I believe we can help others see the beauty in life — one person at a time. And if we can’t and they’re too stubborn, then karma will teach them.
If you’re like me and let things such as this example bother you so much, just breathe. Inhale to the count of four and exhale to the count of eight. This slows your heart rate and calms you down much more quickly. Practice this every time you get angry or you feel like you’re about to get angry. If you can’t control your anger, you might end up like the driver who cut me off and you just might have to experience karma. 😉